The Kansas City Royals

Its been 20 years since a group of wise and wonderful men brought the world the movie Major League. In Hollywood time, that means its almost ripe enough to re-make. May I offer my humble suggestion that instead of basing the next great movie following the "baseball team goes from loser to champ" plot line on the Cleveland Indians, we should consider the Kansas City Royals a much better option. If an ex-showgirl were to buy the Royals tomorrow, how many people would notice? If she were to staff the team with ex-cons, 40 year-olds, and a Cuban defector who can't hit curveballs...would it make your local newspaper?

Fast, name someone on the Royals not named Zack Greinke.

Perhaps the above exagerates the Royals' misery somewhat. There really are bright spots in Kansas City in the summer time. Zack Greinke was the American League's best pitcher in 2009 and received the Cy Young Award for his efforts. First Baseman Billy Butler hit .301 last year while slugging 21 homers and 51 doubles. The team added Rick Ankiel and Scott Podsednik to (theoretically) improve the outfield. This year could be the year in which Alex Gordon finally becomes the second coming of George Brett. And Jose Guillen has yet to do anything so egregiously crazy as to cause harm to his teammates or the Royals fanbase.

Pitching

A story. I braved ungodly traffic on a Tuesday night last July and drove up to Baltimore because I couldn't resist the pitching matchup offered by an Orioles-Royals game. Baltimore's prized pitching prospect Chris Tillman would be making his big league debut against Royals ace Zack Greinke. Too good to miss. Tillman's 4 2/3 inning performance was more or less unmemorable, but Grienke's outing and the game's eventual outcome proved a nifty microcosm of the 2009 Kansas City Royals experience.

The top of the Orioles lineup took some good hacks against Greinke in the first inning. An Adam Jones homer put the Birds up 2-0 and Nick Markakis followed with a resounding double that nearly left the Yard. After a walk and a hit batter, Greinke struck out 2 Orioles and wriggled himself out of trouble. He then proceeded to allow a grand total of 3 baserunners in the next 5 innings and finished his outing at 6 IP, 2 R, 7K. Greinke made big league hitters look silly over and over again all night. He left with the Royals ahead 3-2. In the bottom of the 7th, the Royals bullpen took over. Before the Kansas City relief corps had recorded an out, the Orioles led 5 to 3. Two more Orioles runs in the 8th gave the game its final score: Baltimore 7 Kansas City 3.

Zack Greinke's 2009 was fully worthy of the post-season accolades he received. He is a top flight major league starter and a bona fide staff ace. Behind Greinke, however, things get dicey. Gil Meche met and often exceeded expectations in his first two seasons in Kansas City after he signed a rich contract to lead the Royals' staff but last year, in year number 3, Meche struggled mightily, finishing with a 6-10 record. After Meche, the Royals will turn to Lukle Hochevar, who pitched to the tune of a 2.49 in his 7 wins but to the off-pitch screech of a 10.88 in his 13 losses. The final 3 slots in the rotation will likely go to two members of the three-headed monster of Kyle Davies (5.27 ERA), Brian Bannister (a hopeful 1.37 WHIP), and Robinson Tejeda (only 6 starts last year, but, in combined starting/relieving he ran up a dandy 3.54 ERA).

Like the rotation, the bullpen features a lights-out performer. Closer Joakim Soria managed 30 saves in 2009 despite some DL time and despite playing for a team that managed only a meager 65 wins. Unfortunately, like the rotation, the rest of the bullpen often stinks up the joint. Kyle Farnsworth, though in possession of a strong right arm, is highly flammable between the months of April and October. Juan Cruz had a 5.72 ERA last year, Victor Marte ran up an 8.25, and Dusty Hughes posted a 5.14. Possible bright spots include Carlos Rosa (1.22 WHIP in late season action last year) and Ramon Colon (3rd best ERA in the Royals pen last year).

Hitting

The aforementioned Billy Butler hits line drives. Sometimes those line drives travel great distances or land between outfielders. He'll still be 23 on Opening Day, the best is yet to come. Joining Butler in the middle of the Royals' lineup will be Alex Gordon, who just turned 26 and has yet to fulfill very lofty expectations for his offensive prowess. If he's healthy in 2010, this could be the year he improves on his pedestrian .250 career BA and .746 career OPS.

The outfield will feature a rotation of Guillen, Ankiel, Podsednik, David DeJesus, and Josh Fields. Fields came over in the offseason along with Chris Getz (who will likely have second base duties this season) in the trade which made the once promising Mark Teahan a White Sock. Ankiel, as of this writing, is nursing a sore ankle and is missing Spring Training time; not the most promising start to the pitcher-turned-outfielder's new life in Kansas City.

Behind the plate, the Royals will turn to Jason Kendall this season. Since the 2000 season, Kendall has managed a slugging percentage above .400 only once. Last year, Kendall's .305 slugging percentage was less than half of what Cardinals slugger Albert Pujols managed. The Royals speak highly of his ability to handle pitchers and "call a game," but his offense really is awful. Backing up Kendall will be Brayan Pena, who hit a grand total of 25 homeruns in 654 minor league games. Thats not many. The Royals won't get much punch from their catchers this year.


Wrapping Up

In 2009 the Royals got featured twice in an excellent commercial.



In 2010, the Royals will have to hope that Greinke, Soria, and Butler repeat and even magnify their past successes, Gordon finally reaches his potential, and Ankiel, Meche, Kendall and Podsednik rediscover whatever magic they cast in previous successful years. This is not the worst team in baseball. And, in an AL Central which boasts mediocre Detroit and Cleveland clubs, the Royals may even be able to make a run at 3rd place. But alot has to go right for that to happen.

A LOT has to go right.

Otherwise, with the team far out of contention, August in Kansas City may be a long, intolerable month.

Warning. THIS CONTAINS ONE PIECE OF ADULT LANGUAGE. But its Ichiro. So its funny.